When I was in senior high school, I have a best friend named Tirza. She is a smart girl and she is beautiful. Altough she is a Javanese girl and I am a Chinese, we can be a good friend. She is a Javanese but she has bright skin. In other side, I am a Chinese but I have a tan skin.

One day, a Chinese boy named Handy was falling in love with her. Handy is a smart boy and he usually teached my best friend what she did not understand. My best friend liked him too because he is handsome and he is a kind person. Handy came to Tirza’s house to teach her Mathematics, Physics, and Chemists. My best friend’s parents liked Handy. They were agree if Tirza became Handy’s girlfriend. Tirza’s parent did not mind even Handy has different race with Tirza’s family. After a few days, he invited Tirza to come to his house and meet his parents. Tirza accepted the invitation and went to his house in a Saturday night. Handy’s parents were very welcome with my best friend. However, after Tirza went home, they forbid Handy meeting her again. Handy asked his parents why they forbid him. They said that he is not allowed to have a relationship with Tirza because altough she is beautiful, she is a Javanese girl.

My best friend and I thought that it was probably because Handy is a boy and Tirza is a girl. However, a few months later, we knew that we were wrong.

There was a Javanese boy who was falling in love with me. He is my friend since we were in Sunday School. He is my church mate and he is an honest boy. My parents know him well since he was a child. Nevertheless, when my parents knew that he was falling in love with me, they said that I had to stay away from him for a while. My parents did not agree if I had a special relationship with him. When I asked them about the reason, they said that it is because of his race. My parents do not hate the boy but they did not allow me to be his girlfriend.

After that, I can conclude that most of Chinese parents will not allow their children to have any special relationship with Javanese people. In other side, most of Javanese parents allow their children to have any special relationship with Chinese people. These facts happen to both boys and girls.

The Chinese people forbid their children because Chinese people and Javanese people have different culture and habits. For example, Javanese people will be okay to share the room with their children. By contrast, Chinese people do not really like if they must share their room with their children. Those differences will make the marriage life difficult for both of them. Also Chinese people sometimes value their selves higher than the actual condition. In their opinion, Chineses have higher status and position than the Javaneses.

By contrast, Javanese people do not mind with the race. Sometimes they feel proud if they have a Chinese mate. Javanese people do not feel that they will get difficulties if they marry Chinese people.

From this situation, I can learn something for the intercultural understanding pupose. To understand someone, I also have to know his or her culture and way of thinking. When I know their culture, I will understand their way if thinking and decrease the conflict between I and them.